An Oldie But a Goodie! Olsons 2011
Yes, my friends, I have another book for you. I never tire of reading. My interest is in business, memoirs, historical fiction and pretty much anything Lysa Terkheurst writes. I have several books going right now, one on my kindle, one on audio and one or two physical books. The one I am enjoying the most is, Love Lives Here by Maria Goff. In it, Maria talks about her life, her family and what is important to her. I am about half way through and I have two favorite parts.
The first, is where she discusses her life’s greatest ambition… being a wife and a mom. I don’t know about you but in my neck of the woods, no one talks about this being their greatest ambition. There is always something else, usually a career or a cause. I was taught to have a career because of the underlying fear of death or divorce. Living in fear means that all women need to, “have something for yourself in case something happens.” Which is code for,”make your own money so you never go without.” There is absoutely nothing wrong with having a big career or fighting for big causes, but not all of us are wired this way.
I found it refreshing that Maria shares her joy of being a wife and mom because I struggle with guilt for feeling like I should be doing more. Maybe not more, but it’s hard when none of the things I do for the family or for our business can be quantified with a financial contribution. Nothing I do helps us financially. I never had a career. I went from college to ministry to marriage to helping run a business. I have a few licenses which I have done relatively little with and I help with the business but I am not the one on the front lines helping people with their taxes or finances. I am in the background working on the website, keeping the books in line, updating processes, processing paperwork for our financial clients and providing laughs for the amazing team of people we work with. This sounds like a lot but it’s actually pretty low-key. I work from home as well as from the office and I shut it down in the early afternoon to go get the kids, run them to their various events and get dinner on the table.
I am aware that the contributions I do make at the office would need to be hired out if I wasn’t there so yes, it’s helpful but sometimes it feels like not enough. Reading Maria’s words reminded me once again that my life does not need to look like everyone else’s to have significance and meaning. I like what I do and it is both helpful to the business and to our family.
My other favorite part? This…
This silly picture of me was taken right after I had, finally, begun dating Mr. Wonderful. I detailed the particulars of the photo here. The best part about this photo in relation to Maria’s book is that I am at a camp on Catalina Island on the top of a mountain with a cross on it. Several other counselors and I had taken our tired group of Jr High girls on a hike to see the sunrise. Maria accepted Jesus into her heart on that very same mountain, right in front of the cross. When I read her story I felt like I was right there with her because I have been there. It is a special place with special memories.
What I am enjoying most about the book is that it’s about love. Maria’s husband Bob is a trial lawyer who looks like the Grandpa from the movie UP. He travels all over the world bringing balloons, justice and love to impoverished people in refugee camps and war-torn countries. Maria, for the most part, stays home and makes sure that Bob and their 3 grown children have a soft place to land when they return from their various adventures.
I have been on a quest this year to learn to love better, to remind myself that love is a verb and not a noun. Love isn’t about what you say but rather what you do. Honestly, I have a long way to go but finding words to read which remind me that I am exactly where I am supposed to be, help me to press on to continue to become the woman God has created me to be. I constantly remind myself not to feel guilt over the decisions I have made and that the contributions I make are enough. In the end, the most important thing to me is to love and be loved. If this is my end goal then I am on the right track.
Have a Fabulous Day My Friends!
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Tiff, early on John and I decided that making money wasn’t our goal so I spent many years being a mom to my sons. I loved it. I loved being the gramma to my grandsons when they needed someone to take them to school and events. When that era was finished, I became the real helpmate to my husband and learned what love was all about. Yesterday I was asked my secret to 53 years ( coming Monday) and I told them putting the other person first. That’s called patience and it goes hand in hand with love. You know what I’m doing.
Aww Yes! How to keep balance and joy in the journey whatever that looks like. To accept what that looks like compared to ourselves not others. You nailed it Tiff! Thanks for your encouraging words and sharing your wisdom.
Oh, Sweet Sandy, you make me tear up. I sure do love you and I love the life you live and how it blesses so many people. 53 Years! Wow. You never cease to amaze me. ♥
Tiffany, we celebrated 53 years last August…54 coming up. This says so much about those of us who chose to stay at home and make a family. The societal push to “do more, be more” is always hanging around our necks but now at this juncture, as I watch our tall, handsome grandson bound up the stairs, I am so happy with the impact of love and care I have been here to offer. Stride on!!
Thank you for your encouragement, Judy! 54 years! Congratulations! ♥