Time 3: Discombobulated…

old-clock / Discombobulated ... Keeping track of your time

This is the third installment of a three part series on, time…

It’s a funny thing when you get off track. Since December, when I began feeling a bit better, I started writing out a daily schedule for myself. It has kept me focused and has helped me to better evaluate what I am doing with my time.

For the last month or so I have been a little off kilter and haven’t been able to figure out why. I have been in a daze wandering around with no real direction. Things are getting accomplished but there has been no rhyme or reason to anything that I have achieved. It dawned on me the other day that I haven’t been writing out a daily schedule lately and I traced it back to a few weeks ago when we got some hard news and had to make some big decisions and adjustments. Fortunately the news was not health related but it was a big blow none the less.

For those of you that know me this will come as no surprize but for those of you that don’t I need to inform you that I am a bit of an emoter. You cry, I cry, you laugh, I laugh… I feel stuff. Well since cancer, the subsequent menopause and the whole no estrogen thing, well, let’s just say that when things go awry I can become a bit of a mess. When the afore mentioned situation settled a bit I thought I was ok. I got going again and kept moving forward… or so I thought.

The truth is that although I am in motion, I haven’t had any real direction and even though things are getting accomplished it has been quite a struggle to keep my mind focused on where I need to go next. It dawned on me the other day that I hadn’t written out a daily schedule for myself in weeks. Writing down what I needed to get done for the day and having something tangible to look at that reminded me where I needed to be at certain times and kept me focused, on track and gave me something to check off when I was done.

Planner / Discombobulated

Without the schedule I have no frame of reference, no box to check to show myself what I have accomplished and no answer for how I spent my time on any given day. My brain either due to age or chemo is not firing on all cylinders. I have spent the last several months sorting photos, scanning negatives and cleaning out almost all the crevices in our home, but if you ask me what I did on any given day I had no answer. I just can’t seem to recall details like I used to. I don’t know about you but when you begin to think about how you are spending your time and you can’t come up with any answers, it’s kind of depressing. I was feeling kind of worthless and unuseful and lame.

I don’t recall ever feeling this way before, the need to validate my actions or inactions. All I know is that these days I like keeping a schedule and I know now that I need to be on the lookout for when life gets in the way I need to stick to what I know is good for me and keeps me sane so that I can step back, evaluate my situation and then get back to what helps me process life better.

Plan / Discombobulated

I like knowing what I am doing and I like having a list that I can visibly see and check off and know for sure what I have done for today and what I will get done for tomorrow. I’m not so tied to the schedule that I beat myself up when things come up and something gets left undone, I just add whatever got missed to my schedule for the next day and keep moving forward.

What about you? What methods do you use to keep yourself on track?

Let's Hang Out! Sign up here to get all updates sent directly to your inbox.

Speak Your Mind

*